I am an argumentative person. I’m passionate and not shy to make my voice heard. I love politics and would describe myself as left leaning in my beliefs.
I met Nick on Bumble, a dating app that encourages women to message first. He was charming and flirty. He seemed articulate and confident. We agreed to meet for a drink at a bar in the centre of Newcastle. We didn’t get off to the best start after I managed to drop a whole gin and tonic in his lap (are you cringing as well?). I should have just left at that point.
Nick was a teacher at a challenging school and he explained that the children had a lot of behavioral problems. What he said next made me shudder…
“See, this is why we should just bring back the cane. I’d happily beat the s**t out of some of the little b*stards”
I couldn’t quite believe what had just come out of this guys mouth. He was supposed to be moulding the minds of the future…he sounded like the kind of teacher that makes school unbearable. Nick went on to talk about his own political beliefs and tell me why all mine were wrong. Highlights included:
- Children are only badly behaved because of their parents, they should bring them up better
- Foreign kids don’t belong in the school system
- Prison doesn’t work, the government should bring back capital punishment
- Feminists should just stop complaining because they have an easier life than men, women are just being overly sensitive. Men work harder anyways
While I disagreed with almost everything that came out of Nick’s mouth (he said he liked the gin I chose…so that was pleasant), I persevered. Just because I didn’t agree with his politics didn’t make him a bad human.
The date continued to be very led by Nick. He told me that teaching wasn’t what he really wanted to do (shocker), he explained that he either wanted to open his own healthy eating take-away; or pursue a career as a rock star…I laughed…he wasn’t joking. It was awkward.
It was very quickly becoming apparent that we did not get on. The final straw came when Gloria Gaynor – I Will Survive came on and he didn’t know the song or the artist. By this point, I’d made up my mind.
We awkwardly said goodbye and mumbled something about having a nice time. My flatmate picked me up (I’d been keeping her updated at regular intervals), and we talked about how hard it is to be attracted to someone whose political views are so abhorrent to your own.
It’s not Nick’s fault that we didn’t click, heck he can think what he wants…he should probably consider a different career because he clearly hates kids but that’s besides the point. I was frustrated with myself. Just because I didn’t agree with his beliefs, I became instantly un-attracted to Nick.
I love being challenged, and debate is healthy for the most part but fundamentally, I find it hard to relate to someone that is my complete political-polar opposite. Maybe it’s something I should work on…
[In case you’re interested, Nick text me after the date saying that he didn’t think we meshed well but wished me the best of luck in my search for Mr Right…cheers mate]